ASOS Returns

I spend half my life returning things. Online shopping has become my preferred means of acquiring expensive and unnecessary items, and since most brands now offer free returns too (..except Missguided, *gives angry eyes*), I tend to go a bit overboard. ASOS is always, and has always been, my number one online shopping destination. I’m also a premier member, so not only do I have my free returns, but also free next day delivery! I take WAAAAAY too much advantage of this. Example: for my boyfriend’s graduation I ordered a total of TWENTY THREE dresses and returned twenty two of them. I am probably one of their most hated customers. But, as someone who prefers trying things on in the comfort of their own home and being able to run upstairs going “what do you think?!”, I probably won’t be stopping any time soon.

My latest order had Spring in mind, and included a really lovely Motel pinafore and bustier playsuit of rockabilly style. Unfortunately, both pieces are going back to ASOS ASAP! Here’s why:

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Public Desire: First Purchase, Bummed Out

Writing negative reviews of purchases is never fun: it’s disappointing. I don’t write them if it’s my mistake, or I picked the wrong size or it was a general error or whatever. I write them because I am sad. I take my shopping pretty seriously, and having something go against your expectations pretty strongly – I take that almost personally. Especially if it’s a purchase you’ve been leading up to or waiting for the right time to make!

I’ve followed Public Desire on Instagram for probably a good year now, and since my hunt for over the knee boots has so far been fruitless, I turned to them to find my thigh high 70s suede dream shoes. This is what I wanted: a low heel, no knee peeking out, a tight fit over the calves and thigh, an ability to stay up.

I picked Carmen, the over the knee faux suede boot, priced at £39.99, but down to £35 with a student discount.

  
I was impressed by how quickly it was delivered, but was soon anxious when I had the package in my hands as I could feel the shoebox was squashed inside.

Unboxing: 


I was right: the box was squashed. Squashed to the point of broken – the lid was askew and had all four corners broken, and one corner of the box was particularly crushed. I was worried about the shoe inside, but figured it’d be pretty well protected.

  
It wasn’t. It had one piece of tissue paper half crumpled over the top of the shoes. The shoes has nothing in them to hold their shape: no cardboard bit in the toe, no tissue paper ball. I have bought shoes online for a solid number of years, and even the cheapest have arrived with some kind of tissue paper protection.

  
Before I took the shoes out of the box I’d been pretty “it wasn’t their fault, must be Royal Mail cramming too many boxes in one van”, but after opening the box and taking the shoes out, I saw how the inside of the box was pretty dirty (and note that sad single piece of flattened tissue paper). Thinking about it now, I feel like I could have received someone’s return! I actually want to  order something else from them to find out if this is what every order comes like, or if I just got unlucky.

But the shoes themselves, were they okay? No.

They weren’t damaged, but they were not what was expected.

  
I don’t have thin legs, and I certainly don’t have thinner legs than the woman modelling the boots: but these were not tight anywhere, eventually dropping down below my knee with minimal movement, bunched horribly, gaped at the thighs. The bottom right photo of the set shows on one leg where I wanted the boots to be, and on the other leg where it naturally fell to with a single step. And whilst I am tall, I have disproportionately short legs – I can’t imagine my legs being longer than the models. The boots have a zip, but definitely was not required to get my legs in. 

I am so unimpressed! They arrived half an hour ago, I’ve written this post, and I’m now packaging them up to return before my uni class. Have any of you ordered from Public Desire before, what’s your experience been like? I don’t want to write them off completely. And, a more desperate question, does anyone have over the knee boots which they love? 

Enjoy your Tuesday! Xxx

Gemma’s 21st, and Dreamboys Galore

I always forget that I’m a solid smidge older than most my uni friends! This Saturday we pre-emptively celebrated my flatmate Gemma’s birthday – she turns 21 next Saturday, but as she’s going home for the big day itself, we decided to celebrate in advance. We were at a loss as to what to do, originally, and were even super close to booking us all in at a spa. However, and to be honest I cannot remember how the idea even cropped up, we decided on male strippers. Duh.

Our next task was actually finding a strip club in London that targeted an audience that was interested in men. Harder than it sounds! After breaking through the adult locks on our 4G, we were able to find the Dreamboys, gathered the girls, and got the tickets sorted. Now, I’ve been to strip clubs, but never have I seen male strippers. We knew first up that it was going to be heavy on the hen parties, and we knew that we were going to be reduced to shameless giggles the ENTIRE time.


First up! Makeup and outfits: Continue reading

intu MK: haul #2

A product to sum up this haul? Ciaté’s aptly titled polish, “Shopping Spree”. Oopsie!


I had SUCH good luck in TK Maxx! It can be so hit and miss, but I seem to be doing really well in the MK branch. All the DKNY and Elle Macpherson! If you remember from my last intu MK haul post, I scored some killer Elle Macpherson then too ahh.

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intu MK Shopping Centre: haul and #fotd


So we all know I could shop for England. But last Monday I was super restrained, perhaps mostly because I was out with my mum and aunt and uncle, and we only had a few hours. But! What I did buy I was super, super happy with – so maybe there’s something to be said for not going over the top when purchasing.

What I bought:

  • Topshop fur hat (£1!! Love sales)
  • Topshop shift dress (£34)
  • Elle Macpherson bra (£12.99 from TK Maxx, the original tag says its RRP was $99 – so incredible savings there)
  • Makeup Revolution Mermaids vs Unicorns palette
  • MUA concealer in fair, and their colour correcting powder
  • Maybelline’s Great Lash and matte finishing powder
  • And my fave makeup wipes as they were half price at Superdrug, Nivea’s exfoliating wipes

It was also the first time I’d been out shopping since I had my surgery, so I felt the need to dress up a bit and look my most presentable. It was my first experience of accessible shopping, as I was out in my wheelchair, and I couldn’t have managed without my family helping me reach things, navigate shops and get between rails, carry items, and even try things on in the changing room.  The staff I encountered in the shops were all super wonderful and accomodating, especially in Topshop.

Anyway! I wanted a look that would last, survive trying on clothes (biggest pet peeve in the world: people who leave makeup stains on clothes), and would distract from the huge cast on my leg.

I went for ultra thin and sharp wings (using the tape trick to help) and lots of rosy highlighter to give me some colour.

Close-ups of the products bought –

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Culottes: the only way forward

I am a sucker for vintage clothing, and I am even bigger sucker for reasonably priced vintage clothing. It seems like a lot of the time you slap the word “vintage” on something and suddenly there’s an extra digit added to the price tag. So, I watch where I go: markets that are not advertised as ‘fairs’, markets that don’t specialise in clothing or are attempting to be edgy, charity shops that are run by old dears, and shops that advertise themselves as vintage stores but have large sections dedicated to discounted items/sales/special offers. Examples? Broadway market (a food and craft market, with one seller of vintage material), East End Vintage Clothing in E3 (massive market under the railway arches, constantly doing specials like £1 knits or all-you-can-fit-in-this-bag for £10), Camden (but look for deals, and get off the highstreet: head for the stables).

On with this post! Why do I love culottes?

Like a skirt, but different
Can sit with spread legs! And climb about!
Oddly flattering – high trimmed waist, is like a skirt over the thighs
Easy to style: sliders or heels? basic tee or plunging crop?

Mostly it’s the sitting with spread legs that gets me. I’m constantly splayed about, or have my chin resting on my knee, so these are pretty good for me. It’s funny how culottes have come back in, especially as I still clearly remember having them as part of my old school uniform and just “what are these?! a skirt? shorts? make up your mind!” – but now I’m definitely a little more appreciative. I love that at first glance you might think I’m wearing a maxi skirt, I love how they flow and how light they are. So, here are my two pairs. Vintage from Broadway Market, and got them for two for £20 – thanks to the very lovely man who wanted to close up and go home for the day.

Above, pale blue and white floral culottes. Zip down the front, fake pockets.

And my second pair, a khaki floral with side zip.

Read on for styling and daily, actual outfits ~

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Still the 70s, Still Loving Stripes

Yes, hello, it’s me banging on about stripes again.

We know Woodstock vibes are in, that flares and burnt orange have returned to the hangers, that suede and suedette (complete with ratty tassels) are back. Stripes, however, are always in. They’re a basic staple. So, how can I argue that they’re suddenly oh-so-extra in? Well, on the most basic level: look at what shops are stocking. Lines are everywhere: in knitted fabrics, in tight pleats, in contrast binding, in square necklines, and in the zig zags of chevron.

from Cooperative

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Summer, and Black Fur






Outfit can be seen in detail here, sub coat. Make up details are in the same post, though I smudged my eyes here for a grungier look. Nothing like a mini shoot by the water tanks and falling-down shed! (Credit to me mam for being sah patient.)

Faux fur coat – M&S
Choker – Topshop
Top – Primark
Trousers – River Island

70s: Beauty Challenge

Funnily enough, I actually did quite a bit of research before starting on this one – I was super set on doing Twiggy’s classic eyes, but needed to confirm that I was thinking of the right decade! Twiggy’s rise to fame was in the late 60s and, thankfully, her look continued into the early 70s. Therefore, fun eyes were a-go. Less fortunately though, they kind of turned out a little more difficult than expected, especially as I either have an even more asymmetrical face than I previously though, or I’m just rubbish at drawing lines. Probably a bit of both! I had a lot of fun with this, and having found some incred 70s make up looks (yay for digitalisation and being able to access editorials and magazine covers online), I might have another go and create a different 70s look tomorrow.

Special thanks go out to my lovely aunty (whose home I’m currently living in, too, she’s an angel), who is constant fashion inspiration. I went on a little bit about her here, when I was trying on her late 60s crochet dresses. Knowing that this post was incoming, I demanded that she get some of her polaroids out so I could take pictures of them to show off what an absolute babe she was, and to be honest, still is.

Literally my dream haircut, too. Apparently she used to sleep with her sideburn-y bits taped down, so they’d stay in shape! She was over six foot by 15, and all legs. Some of her dresses in the photo albums, oh my days. Anyway. One day I’ll find the photos of my dad in his platforms and flares. One day.

~ Outfit, make up breakdown and product list ~

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Late 60s: crochet dresses


One of my favourite things about being in my aunt and uncle’s house, is getting to spend the majority of the visit down memory lane. And not always my memories, either. My aunt is like me: keen to hold onto things, finding importance in mementos, and appreciating the history and stories of certain objects. We love photos, and will often spend time looking through albums. We know our family tree right the way back.

I’ve been here only a few days, and already have tried on rings (my granny’s, great grandma’s and my aunty’s old engagement ring), laughed about the things my mum used to wear (she was very, very out there and folk-y), and tried on the handmade crochet dresses that my great grandmother had made for my aunty! These dresses are from the late 60s, and my aunt must’ve been in her 20s. There were three: a gold, sleeveless shift (not pictured — too small for me!), a bronze shift, and a lavender and silver shift of the same design. The two dresses pictured also had matching purses to go with them!

Both dresses were completely unlined, and definitely on the small side in my opinion! I’d tried them on once before, when I was 12, and they fit then, so I suppose I should be glad that I’ve grown since then haha! My aunt was an absolute rail, and had actually been spotted and asked to model, but she’d declined.

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